Past Simple or Present Perfect Exercise 4

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she (visit) her grandmother last month

Choose the past simple or the present perfect.

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ESLBUZZ

Past Tense of Visit: Mastering English Grammar

By: Author ESLBUZZ

Posted on Last updated: September 27, 2023

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In this article, we will explore how to form the past tense of visit, common mistakes to avoid, and provide you with practice exercises to help you master the past tense of visit. By the end of this article, you will have a solid understanding of the past tense form of ‘visit’ and be able to use it confidently in your writing and speaking.

Key Takeaways

  • The past tense of ‘visit’ is ‘visited’.
  • To form the past tense of ‘visit’, add ‘-ed’ to the base form of the verb.
  • Practice exercises can help you master the past tense of ‘visit’.

Past Tense of Visit: Mastering English Grammar

Understanding Past Tense

As an English learner, understanding the concept of past tense is crucial in communicating effectively in English. The past tense is used to describe actions or events that have already happened. In this section, we will explore the different forms of past tense and how to use them correctly.

Regular Past Tense Verbs

Most regular verbs in English form the past tense by adding -ed to the base form of the verb. For example, the past tense of “visit” is “visited”. Here are some more examples:

  • Walk – walked
  • Talk – talked
  • Play – played

Irregular Past Tense Verbs

Irregular verbs in English have a different form in the past tense. These verbs do not follow the standard -ed rule. Here are some common irregular verbs and their past tense forms:

Using the Past Tense in Sentences

To use the past tense in a sentence, we need to know the subject, verb, and object. For example, “I visited my grandparents last weekend.” In this sentence, “I” is the subject, “visited” is the verb in the past tense, and “my grandparents” is the object.

Practice Exercises

Here are some exercises to help you practice using the past tense:

  • Fill in the blanks with the correct form of the verb in parentheses:
  • Yesterday, I (eat) a delicious pizza for dinner.
  • She (buy) a new car last week.
  • Rewrite the following sentences in the past tense:
  • I am going to the store. (I went to the store.)
  • He plays soccer every weekend. (He played soccer every weekend.)

The Verb Visit

If you’re learning English, you’ll need to know how to use the verb “visit” in the past tense. In this section, we’ll cover the basics of how to use “visited” in English grammar.

Past Tense of Visit

The past tense of “visit” is “visited.” This means that if you want to talk about a visit that happened in the past, you would use “visited” in your sentence. For example:

  • I visited my grandparents last weekend.
  • She visited the museum yesterday.

Using “Visited” in Sentences

To use “visited” in a sentence, you’ll need to know how to conjugate the verb correctly. Here are some examples:

  • I visited my friend’s house yesterday.
  • He visited his parents over the weekend.
  • We visited the beach last summer.

Here are some exercises to help you practice using “visited” in sentences:

  • Fill in the blank: I __________ my sister last night. (visited)
  • Rewrite the sentence in the past tense: She visits her grandparents every Sunday. (She visited her grandparents every Sunday.)
  • Make a sentence using “visited” and “museum.” (She visited the museum last week.)

If you’re learning English grammar, it’s important to understand how to form the past tense of verbs. In this section, we’ll explore how to form the past tense of the verb ‘visit’.

The past tense form of ‘visit’ is ‘visited’. To form the past tense, simply add ‘-ed’ to the base form of the verb because it’s a regular verb. Here are some examples:

  • Present tense: I visit my grandmother every week.
  • Past tense: I visited my grandmother last week.

It’s important to note that ‘visited’ is also the past participle form of ‘visit’. The past participle is used in the present perfect and past perfect tenses. Here are some examples:

  • Present perfect: I have visited my grandmother many times.
  • Past perfect: I had visited my grandmother before she passed away.

Here are some more examples of regular verbs in past tense:

It’s important to practice using the past tense of ‘visit’ in context. Here are some example sentences:

  • I visited my friend in the hospital yesterday.
  • She visited her grandparents over the weekend.
  • We visited the museum last month.
  • They had visited the city before, so they knew their way around.

By understanding how to form the past tense of ‘visit’, you’ll be able to communicate more effectively in English. Keep practicing and you’ll get the hang of it in no time!

Examples of ‘Visited’ in Sentences

When learning the past tense of the verb ‘visit’, it is important to understand how it is used in sentences. Here are some examples of the past tense of ‘visit’, which is ‘visited’:

  • “I visited my grandparents last weekend.”
  • “She visited the museum yesterday.”
  • “They visited the park every day during their vacation.”
  • “He visited the doctor twice last month.”

As you can see, the past tense of ‘visit’ is used to describe a completed action in the past. It is often used with a time reference to indicate when the visit occurred.

In addition to using ‘visited’ to describe a single action in the past, it can also be used to describe a repeated action in the past. Here are some examples:

  • “I visited my grandparents every summer when I was a child.”
  • “She visited the museum regularly when she lived in the city.”
  • “They visited the park every weekend during the summer.”

When using ‘visited’ to describe a repeated action in the past, it is often used with an adverb of frequency, such as ‘every’, ‘regularly’, or ‘often’.

It is also important to note that ‘visited’ can be used in various tenses, such as the present perfect and past perfect. Here are some examples:

  • “I have visited Paris twice.”
  • “She had visited the museum before, so she knew what to expect.”
  • “They will have visited all the major tourist attractions by the end of their trip.”

In conclusion, understanding the past tense of ‘visit’ is essential for effective communication in English. By using ‘visited’ in various tenses and contexts, you can accurately describe past actions and experiences.

Common Mistakes and How to Avoid Them

Learning the past tense of the verb “visit” is important for anyone who wants to speak English fluently. However, it can be tricky to use it correctly, especially for non-native speakers. Here are some common mistakes and tips to avoid them:

Mistake 1: Using the wrong form of the verb

Incorrect: I visitted my grandparents last weekend. Correct: I visited my grandparents last weekend.

The past tense of “visit” is “visited”, not “visitted”. Remember to remove the extra “t” at the end.

Mistake 2: Using the present tense instead of the past tense

Incorrect: I visit my friend yesterday. Correct: I visited my friend yesterday.

Using the present tense instead of the past tense is a common mistake. Remember to use the past tense when talking about an action that happened in the past.

Tips to Avoid Mistakes

  • Practice, practice, practice! The more you use the past tense of “visit”, the easier it will become.
  • Pay attention to the context of the sentence. Is it talking about something that happened in the past? If so, use the past tense.
  • Use grammar checkers and dictionaries to help you avoid mistakes.
  • Try to memorize irregular verbs and their past tense forms, including “visit” (“visited”).

By avoiding these common mistakes and practicing using the past tense of “visit”, you will become more confident and accurate in your English language skills.

Past Tense of Visit: Practice Exercises

Learning the past tense of verbs is essential for effective communication in English. In this section, we will provide some practice exercises to help you master the past tense of the verb ‘visit.’

Affirmative Sentences

Fill in the blank with the correct past tense form of ‘visit’:

  • I _______ my grandparents last weekend. (visited)
  • She _______ her friend in the hospital yesterday. (visited)
  • They _______ the museum last month. (visited)

Questions and Negatives

To form questions and negatives in the past tense, we use the auxiliary verb ‘did’ and the base form of the main verb. Here are some practice exercises to help you form questions and negatives in the past tense of ‘visit’:

Rewrite the following sentences into questions and negatives:

She visited her sister yesterday.

  • Did she visit her sister yesterday?
  • She did not visit her sister yesterday.

They went to visit their grandparents last weekend.

  • Did they go to visit their grandparents last weekend?
  • They did not go to visit their grandparents last weekend.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the past tense of visit?

The past tense of visit is visited.

How do you change visit to simple past tense?

To change visit to the simple past tense, you simply add -ed to the end of the verb. Therefore, the simple past tense of visit is visited.

What are some examples of simple past tense of the verb visit?

Here are some examples of simple past tense using the verb visit:

  • She visited her friend in the hospital yesterday.
  • They visited the museum on their trip.

What is the rule for forming the past tense of regular verbs?

The rule for forming the past tense of regular verbs is to add -ed to the base form of the verb. For example, the base form of visit is visit, so the past tense is visited.

Can you give me some irregular past tense verbs?

Yes, here are some irregular past tense verbs:

  • go – went
  • eat – ate
  • see – saw
  • do – did
  • have – had

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"}},{"@type":"Question","name":"How do you use the past tense of visit in a sentence?","acceptedAnswer":{"@type":"Answer","text":"

Here are some examples of using the past tense of visit in a sentence:

  • She visited her family over the weekend.
  • They visited the beach last summer.

Remember to always use the correct form of the verb to match the tense of the sentence.

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Present Perfect vs Past Simple

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I (never/go) to Vienna.

've never been

My great great grandfather (have) five sisters.

He (live) in Manila for a year when he was a student.

Oh no! I (lose) my wallet!

(you/see) Julie today?

Did you see

Have you seen

At the weekend, they (play) football, then they (go) to a restaurant.

have played, have gone

played ,went

I (read) six books this week.(It's Friday)

Amy (live) in Portugal when she was young.

She (visit) her grandmother last month.

has visited

The Vandals (invade) Rome in the year 455.

have invaded

She (live) in seven different countries, so she knows a lot about different cultures.

I (go) to the cinema last night.

Ow! I (cut) my finger!

(you/see) 'The King's Speech'?

John (never/understand) the present perfect.

's never understood

never understood

She (break) her leg the day before her exam.

He (be) here all morning.

King Henry the Eighth of England (have) six wives.

The other day, our cat (bring) home a mouse.

has brought

Tomorrow some friends are coming over. I (see / not) them for ages and they (be / never) at my place before.

haven't seen, have never been

didn't see, never were

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  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> I ______________(never/go) to Vienna. I have never gone to Vienna
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> My great great grandfather ________(have) five sisters. had
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>>He _________(live) in Manila for a year when he was a student lived
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> Oh no! I _________(lose) my wallet! have lost
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> ___________ (you/see) Julie today? have you seen
  • At the weekend, they __________(play) football, then they ________________ (go) to a restaurant played / went
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> Antonia ___________(read) six books this week. has read
  • PAST SIMPLE OR PRESENT PERFECT >>> Amy _____________ (live) in Portugal when she was young. lived
  • She ____________ (visit) her grandmother last month. visited
  • The Vandals ___________ (invade) Rome in the year 455 invaded
  • She __________ (live) in seven different countries, so she knows a lot about different cultures. has lived
  • I __________(go) to the cinema last night. went
  • Ow! I ___________(cut) my finger have cut
  • ___________ (you/see) 'The King's Speech'? have you seen
  • John ______________ (never/understand) the present perfect, but he speaks very nice English. has never understood.
  • John ______________ (never/understand) the present perfect, until he played this baamboozle. never understood

she (visit) her grandmother last month

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she (visit) her grandmother last month

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How I Learned to Love My Granddaughter Without Fear

she (visit) her grandmother last month

T he phone call from my daughter in North Carolina came at six o’clock in the morning, unusually early for her. “I’m pregnant,” Maggie announced, her voice bubbling with delight.

From 1,600 miles away I put down my mug of smoky dark-roast coffee and gave a shout. Her news was the last thing I would have expected as I sat in my rented house in Albuquerque, watching roadrunners skitter over the xeriscaping in the front yard, stabbing at the dried mealworms I’d just put out for them. 

Maggie and her husband, Jimmy, together for 11 years and married for eight, had been on the fence about having children. Four years into their marriage, they decided to try for a baby. But after years passed, they both assumed and then accepted it wasn’t going to happen.

Read More: What My Family Taught Me About Loneliness

I’d looked on with a mixture of curiosity and a small bit of envy as friends welcomed one grandchild after another. My oldest son, Liam, in his early 40s, was at the time unattached. I’d resigned myself to the possibility of never knowing that particular brand of joy, although I also couldn’t imagine what it would be like to actually be someone’s grandmother.

And yet, here I was, trying to wrap my head around the idea. I walked through the house, my brindle Boxer dogging my footsteps as I did a quick inventory of room after room. In the next couple of days, I began packing up my belongings and arranging for housing with dear friends back home. 

During one of our phone calls, my daughter had asked, “What do you want your grandmother name to be?”

“I have absolutely no idea,” I confessed. 

Meanwhile, I worked to tamp down a rising anxiety. My second child, Cooper, had been born 40 years ago with a heart defect. When he was 4 days old, he had closed-heart surgery to repair a coarctation of the aorta. What we didn’t know — what no one could have known then, with limited ability to see inside an infant’s heart — was there were other, more deadly defects hidden within, two holes in the wall separating the atria. When he was 6 weeks old, he died quietly at home in my arms as I held and rocked him, unaware he was slipping away from me.

Read More: I Got Divorced. But My Family Is Still Whole

When Cooper died, Liam was 2 1/2. To say I became an overly anxious mother would be an understatement. I monitored every bump and bruise, each sniffle and fever. Nightmares of childhood cancer and other life-threatening illnesses pushed their way into everyday activities. After all, I now knew that the worst was possible. 

Then I became pregnant again. After Maggie was born, I slept with her on my stomach most nights, and when she finally transitioned to a crib, I’d go into her room in the morning, half-expecting to find she’d died.

The grip on my heart gradually released, though, as my healthy children grew into their wonderful selves with nothing more than the usual list of childhood maladies and injuries. And now here was my baby having a baby. My emotions roiled with wonder and excitement, but all of it was overshadowed by a deep, resonating dread.

My daughter sent me the first ultrasound photos of â€œLittle Bean,” a nickname they’d given in the earliest days when a pregnancy app indicated the developing clump of cells was the size of a vanilla bean.

I peered at the mottled, blurry image of my grandchild at 8 weeks gestation. “What am I seeing?” I asked.

“Here,” she texted and sent a second photo, this one with a red arrow pointing to a small darkish blob with a hazy dot in it like a dandelion tuft. “The brighter spot is the heart,” she wrote.

she (visit) her grandmother last month

I peered at the picture, trying to imagine the fuzzy image as a beating heart. Something in me broke open, then just as quickly slammed shut. 

Some years before, during my tenure at the domestic-violence and rape crisis agency, a co-worker had asked if I’d mind holding her newborn while she attended a short meeting. I happily took her baby boy in my arms, cooing and grinning at him, and brought him into my office. Sinking into the chair, the first thing I did was check to make sure he was breathing, as easily as one might check to make sure his socks were still on. Hot tears of sorrow and anger spilled down my cheeks at my automatic reaction to holding an infant. 

This is how trauma lives in the body, tentacled through our sense memory. So much of the terrible night my son died remains a blur. What I have recalled all too well is the cold stillness, the weight of his tiny form, and the shock of him being so utterly gone.

Little Bean turned out to be a girl and with the given name June. All ultrasounds and other tests revealed her to be developing as she should. But I couldn’t shake the sense of dread.

“So much could go wrong,” I worried aloud to a friend.

“And so much could go right,” was her loving response.

Read More: We Didn't Have Much Money. My Daughter Still Deserved Joy

Maggie was induced early one morning, and labor progressed slowly over the course of the day. At 9:37 that night I witnessed the moment my daughter pushed her baby girl into the world, a 7 Âœ-lb. miracle with downy dark hair and an adorable button nose. My son-in-law said I should do the honors — the obstetrician handed me the scissors, and I cut the cord, severing June from the warm, liquid world of her mother’s womb, and officially welcoming her Earthside.

But after her first breath, the newborn cry, that plaintive, sharp wail all parents wait for, didn’t come. The nurses took June from my daughter’s arms and continued to rub and stimulate her as she blinked in the glare of the bright room, but her blood oxygen levels remained concerningly low.

“We’re going to take her to the nursery,” one of the nurses said. My son-in-law followed. My daughter, unable to leave the bed because of the epidural, looked at me from across the room.

A chest X-ray confirmed a suspected pneumothorax, a condition in which air leaks into the space between the lung and the chest. Because we live in a small town with a small hospital, June would need to be transported to an NICU an hour and a half away. Watching my daughter and son-in-law say a tearful goodbye to their newborn was one of the most wrenching scenes I’ve ever witnessed. The next morning my daughter was discharged, and I drove her to see her baby girl at the hospital where my son-in-law already was.

The neonatal specialist assured them that the small hole in her lung would likely heal on its own, and three days later they brought June home. “Just forget this happened,” the doctor said. All signs pointed to complete health.

But I was in a tailspin that I couldn’t seem to pull out of. 

Those first weeks I’d come to their house on Friday, taking charge of June at midnight after my daughter nursed her, and giving her the 2 a.m. and 5 a.m. bottles, watching her mouth as she suckled, stroking her soft skin. Did I feel like her grandmother? I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to feel. Friends had described a dizzying happiness at being “in the best club ever.”

What I felt too much of was terror, deathly afraid of the small bundle I held, continually monitoring her rosebud lips for signs of a bluish tint, watching to make sure her chest was rising and falling, panicking when it seemed too long between breaths. The urge to tumble helplessly in love with my granddaughter was in full battle with the freshly resurfaced memories of the night my son died. I kept my fears to myself, not wanting to foist my unease on my already traumatized daughter and son-in-law, who were struggling to return to the normalcy of welcoming this new baby into their lives after her scary start. 

One afternoon, talking on the phone with a friend while driving in town, I heard myself say, “The doctors assured them the hole in her heart would heal.” There was a stunned silence as I realized what I’d said. “I mean her lung,” I said and hung up, pulling into a grocery-store parking lot where I sat with my face in my hands, weeping. In that moment, I knew I had a choice — release the dark grief or risk missing one of the most light-filled times of my life. 

“That was that baby,” I told myself. “This baby doesn’t have any holes in her heart. This baby is fine.” I offered myself a mantra to try. “That was then, this is now.” Whenever the old trepidation would rise, I’d repeat the words, reminding myself of the distance in years and reality between the death of my son and the life of this sweet, healthy baby girl. Gradually, my heart unwound.

One afternoon, while my daughter napped in the next room, I snuggled little June close and rocked her. I leaned down to listen to the sound of her quiet breathing, this time not from fear but wonder. She looked up at me with deep blue eyes rimmed with dark lashes and stared as if memorizing my face. Unable to look away, I let her hold me in the power of her wide-open gaze.

“The brighter spot is the heart,” my daughter had written to me all those months ago, and now baby June and I sat basking in the light of a love big enough to hold it all — yesterday’s grief, today’s joy, and all the beautiful and uncertain tomorrows. 

Outside, a soft breeze blew, and a shard of sunlight shot through the trees. I kissed my granddaughter’s forehead and began to sing.

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‘Every Mother’s Day is a reminder, if reminder were needed, of our good fortune’: Elizabeth Quinn with her mother, who died two years ago, and her granddaughter

I’m a grandmother now, but this Mother’s Day I will miss my mum as keenly as any child

Elizabeth Quinn benefited from more than 60 years of her mother’s wit and wisdom. But when she died at 91, Quinn was unprepared for the role of principal griever

T his Mother’s Day marks just over two years since my mother died. At 91, it wasn’t unexpected. She was one of the increasing number of Australian nonagenarians born in the 1920s and 30s. Her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren were fortunate indeed to have had her around for so many years.

The growth in the rate of Australians living into their 90s has raised the age of “orphaned” baby boomers. I knew my time with her was running out, and was grateful for the benefit of 60-plus years of her wit and wisdom.

When I was in my late 20s, I recall a 65-year-old friend feeling embarrassed by the intensity of her grief at the loss of her elderly mother.

“It’s just that I’ve lived so long with her in my life,” she said. The idea of numbers of years spent together as proportionate to the magnitude of loss was novel to my younger self. Three decades on, I understand. I was a grandmother who had just been made motherless. I felt the loss of my mother as keenly as any child would.

Four-year-old Elizabeth Quinn with her mother in 1962

I was conscious of my good fortune while feeling the absence of 60 years of safe harbour. Despite the relentless advance of dementia and ill health in her final years, my mother remained the wisest and best human I knew.

I’d always thought grieving would come naturally. I hadn’t been sure what that looked like but I imagined that when my time came, I would know how to do it.

When my father died, I diverted my grief to attending to my mother. While she was principal griever, I could keep myself busy watching over her. When my mother died it was different. My children regarded me as principal griever and I was utterly unprepared for the role. I kept myself busy, looking away when the memories drifted in unbidden and deftly sidestepping the solicitations of others.

“I am fine as long as you don’t show me any sympathy,” I would say. I was brittle and brisk. And busy – too busy to be falling into a heap. And yet 


A fortnight after her death, I was in her rose garden gathering two weeks of blooms in a bucket. I found myself weeping at the futility of picking roses for a mother who could no longer derive joy from them, who would no longer open her eyes from sleep, take a second or two to focus on the riot of bright orange, yellow and pink and look to me for confirmation it was indeed her garden that produced these glorious blooms. I found a second bucket and kept cutting the roses, tears flowing unchecked down my face. My sister found me there and wrapped her arms around me. We didn’t need any words. No one understood better than she: we had travelled the path together.

Elizabeth Quinn and her mother toast the birth of Elizabeth’s granddaughter and her mother’s great-granddaughter in 2018

Our mother’s death brought with it a profound sense of loss and, given her precarious state of health over the past two years, an overwhelming feeling of relief. Until the end, although it had been a struggle, we managed to keep her in the home she had lived in for 60 years, looking out on the garden that had given her so much joy. And we had been lucky enough to have shared those years with her. Every Mother’s Day is a reminder, if reminder were needed, of our good fortune.

Grieving at any age is a simple concept. The bereaved grieve the loss of their loved one: there has been a loss, someone has died, and those left behind must live with the loss. So grieving is living with loss – no more and no less. You can do it noisily and visibly, or with barely a ripple on the surface. But you don’t have to do it alone.

  • Mother's Day
  • Death and dying
  • Australian lifestyle
  • Bereavement
  • Parents and parenting

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Most viewed.

Is Mother's Day for moms in the trenches? Woman shares why she takes the day for herself.

she (visit) her grandmother last month

An Indiana mother is going viral for admitting that she doesn't celebrate her mother or mother-in-law on Mother's Day , but on different days, so she can actually enjoy the holiday for herself.

"This may ruffle feathers," Emily Wehner said in her TikTok that has gathered 2.1 million views, "but, I am the one deep into the mothering right now."

"It's Mother's Day, not Grandmother's Day," Wehner said.

In her post, Wehner said she established the “Mother’s Day Rules” after spending her first Mother’s Day "coordinating grandparent visits" and she didn’t get to do anything for herself.

"I was like 'I’m not doing this again,' " she said.

So now her family celebrates her mother and mother-in-law on different days and they do the same setup for Father’s Day.

“I’m gonna take the day how how I wanna take the day,” she ended her video.

Her mom 'completely understands'

Wehner told USA TODAY Tuesday that her mother is very supportive of the change she's made around the holiday.

"As a mom of three daughters, she remembers what it was like to have really little kids and to often feel spread thin," Wehner said. "She completely understands my desire to shift the focus, for now, to spending the day with my little family and doing something for myself that I otherwise might not feel like I have the time or energy to do," she said.

For this Mother's Day, Wehner's husband made brunch reservations for their family of four and just like she said in her TikTok, she will be spending time solo planting in her garden.

"My garden is one of my happy places and I look forward to planting it all winter" she said.

Wehner is challenging other women to take the day for themselves, too.

"Changing something that has been 'the norm' for a long time can be hard and uncomfortable," she said. "I have found that the best thing to do is be honest."

And if it's ultimately decided that Mother's Day is better shared, then another day can be carved out for mom, she suggested.

Is Mother's Day reserved for 'moms in the trenches?'

The debate about which moms should be celebrated on Mother's Day is not new. Last year, TikTok user @bmcpher posed the question about how to handle the "weird" holiday when all the mothers seem to want a piece of it.

"So when do I, as a mother who now lives near her mother, when do I celebrate myself?" she asked.

Another TikToker weighed in on the "Mother's Day for moms in the trenches" debate saying that the bottom line is that moms with young kids should do whatever they want to do on Mother's Day "without obligation or guilt."

Moms go back and forth in comments section

While Wehner's mom is supportive of divvying up Mother's Day festivities, not everyone agreed.

"When did the younger generation just totally throw us to the wolves?" one woman on TikTok said in a video response. "It's just the moms with young kids that should really be celebrated on Mother's Day? That's just the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Another poster wrote, "Ya selfish women want your husbands to forget about their moms for you, can’t wait until your kids grow up and do the same to you."

One suggested there there was "enough love to go around for everyone."

"It honestly shocks me that more people don't just celebrate Mother's Day/Father's Day as one big family get-together and celebrate all the moms/dads in one," the user wrote.

Still, many commenters have come to the side of Wehner and other moms of young kids. "I think the problem is that the planning, gifts, kids still all fall on the young moms, so it is just another day full of work. The moms and MILs should come to us, if they can!" one responded.

Another user wrote, "When I had little kids, the whole day was focused on my ex mother-in-law at her house. I had to pack the kids up and drive and it wasn’t fun/relaxing for ME. I’m 52 and want my son to focus on his wife."

"I think when they talk about 'in the trenches' they mean they don’t want to have to travel to everyone else all day, or just go celebrate only ONE mom that day," another mother shared.

Grammar Quiz

I (never/go) to Vienna.

A. ‘ve never gone

B. haven’t never gone

C. never went

D. never didn’t go

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(A) … I eat that candy? (B) No, you ….

A. Should/should

B. Shouldn’t/don’t

C. Should/shouldn’t

The little mouse __________ away when it saw the cat coming towards it.

A. flinched

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It’s Mother’s Day, and I’ll Sleep, Dance, Camp (or Cry) if I Want To

Some women prefer to spend Mother’s Day without the very people who made them one.

A vintage black and white photo shows a woman sleeping on the floor with her head, arms and legs propped on pillows.

By Alyson Krueger

Jennifer Forness spent last Mother’s Day in tears.

Because her husband had to work, Ms. Forness, an executive assistant who lives in Mount Pleasant, S.C., took their son, now 2, to visit her parents who live outside Philadelphia. “I made a reservation for me and my mom to go to dinner, and we brought my son, and he was screaming,” she said. “We had to get our food to go and leave, and I remember crying in the car and being like, ‘I am so tired.’”

She vowed never again.

For Mother’s Day this year, Ms. Forness, 36, and five girlfriends who are also mothers, are planning to check into Wild Dunes Resort, a hotel about 16 miles east of Charleston, for an overnight stay. The plan is simple: “We are getting massages, we are going to sit by the beach,” she said. “And we are going to have drinks.”

Mother’s Day has long come with connotations that mothers spend it with the very people who made them so — and it usually involves brunch, cards and flowers (or floral prints). Yet some mothers are shedding those expectations and doing whatever they want — including shedding their families.

A few weeks ago, Kendel Jamieson Christoff, 44, was scrolling through TikTok when she came across videos posted by a mother who said she was going to ditch her family on Mother’s Day and spend the holiday alone, doing whatever she wanted.

Ms. Christoff, a registered dietitian who lives in Hubbard, Ohio, has celebrated her fair share of Mother’s Days with her two daughters, who are now 17 and 18. But she wondered if she had been doing it wrong.

“All those years I didn’t celebrate for myself,” she said. “I was planning the brunches or catering the brunches, making the reservations.”

So this year, for the first time, she’s spending the holiday camping. Alone. “I booked a spot from Friday to Monday,” she said. She plans to bring dehydrated meals and granola — foods her family would never touch. “I will have no one to say, ‘Ew, that’s gross,’” she said.

She also plans to read the entire romance fantasy series, A Court of Thorns and Roses. “I’ve been trying to get back into reading these past few months, but all I’ve had time to do are audiobooks,” she said. This weekend she wants to lie “like a vegetable and read.”

Of course, figuring out exactly how to spend your one precious day can be its own chore — and lead to decision paralysis. Taylor Wolfe, a writer and content creator, posted a video satirizing her own indecision: “I just want a nap and a little bit of space. But not too much space,” she says to the camera. “Really, don’t make a big deal out of it. Just a little bit of a deal. Not a huge deal, just the right amount of a deal.”

“Gardening is what I love to do, so that is how I’m going to spend Mother’s Day,” said Emily Wehner, 30, whose husband plans to remove their two children, who are under the age of 4, from the home for at least several hours. Normally when she gardens, “the kids are running around, which means my brain is split.”

Ms. Wehner, a photographer who lives in Indianapolis, has been preparing for the big day, growing seeds in her house, for the last six weeks. “I am so excited. You will see me out there even if it rains.”

Other mothers feel the only way to get peace and quiet is to leave the house.

“I’m going shopping,” said Khloe Kuriatnyk, 30, a content creator who has an 8-year-old, 4-year-old and 5-month-old, who made the TikToks that inspired Ms. Christoff. (Granted, she’s also running a 5k earlier in the day — with her children.) “I’ve seen these summer dresses at Free People all over Instagram, and I’ve been thinking about them nonstop.”

Valerie Cooley, a stay-at-home mother on the Upper East Side of Manhattan who has three children, ages 11, 9 and 4, has spent the last three Mother’s Day weekends at a hotel alone.

“The rule is my family doesn’t bother me,” Ms. Cooley, 46, said. “Whatever it is, they are going to figure it out on their own.” With that time she typically takes a dance class, orders room service and sees a Broadway show.

It’s a decision she feels is against the grain. “My mother is always kind of like, ‘Wow, I can’t believe you choose this,’” she said.

Her husband, Chad Cooley, 45, who works as an investor in hotels, admits it’s not easy to have his wife disappear for a weekend, because she normally takes care of everything to do with the children. “The biggest challenge arises when something changes, and I have to figure out what to do.”

But he’s committed to giving her this gift. “Under no circumstances will I call her,” he said.

“She needs a break from everything,” said their 11-year-old daughter, Isla, in an email. “Like me losing everything and my brother whining about wanting toys.”

Some mothers say they have to work around their families’ expectations to spend Mother’s Day a certain way.

Miranda Cornelius, a high school principal who lives in Boerne, Texas, says she is pressured by her mother every year to attend the family’s annual barbecue. It involves about three hours total of driving and bringing food and her two children — one of whom will likely create suspense around the prospect of a nap. “It’s tiring,” she said.

While Ms. Cornelius, 38, doesn’t feel like she can skip the family event — “We have a culture of you do what your mom wants to do or your grandmother wants to do on Mother’s Day” — she has decided that this year she is going to spend the night before in a hotel all by herself.

“I am going to sleep until midday before going to see my mom,” she said. “I will either watch trash reality TV or scroll or lie by the pool. I don’t know yet, but that’s exactly the point. I can do whatever I want.”

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IMAGES

  1. Girl with Mother Visiting Her Grandmother Stock Photo

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

  2. Girl with Mother Visiting Her Grandmother Stock Image

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

  3. Granddaughter Visiting Grandmother Stock Image

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

  4. How Often Should Grandparents Visit Grandchildren?

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

  5. Visit to my grandmother stock image. Image of grandmother

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

  6. Granddaughter Visit Her Grandmother Through Window Stock Photo

    she (visit) her grandmother last month

VIDEO

  1. Emotional Surprise Visit From Grandma....Again || 6.7.17

  2. Visiting my grandmother and spending quality time with her

  3. Natalie went to visit her grandmother on Mother’s Day 2023

  4. A girl came to visit her grandmother in the hospital and accidentally touched her dying ward mate

  5. Grandmother is surprised when grandkids visit after a year

  6. Baby Surprise! (First-time grandma)

COMMENTS

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  4. Past Simple or Present Perfect Exercise 3

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  21. How I Learned to Love My Granddaughter Without Fear

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    Elizabeth Quinn benefited from more than 60 years of her mother's wit and wisdom. But when she died at 91, Quinn was unprepared for the role of principal griever This Mother's Day marks just ...

  23. Moms 'in the trenches' debate Mother's Day: 'Not Grandmother's Day'

    1:08. An Indiana mother is going viral for admitting that she doesn't celebrate her mother or mother-in-law on Mother's Day, but on different days, so she can actually enjoy the holiday for ...

  24. I (never/go) to Vienna. A. 've never gone ...

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  25. Spending Mother's Day Without the People Who Made You One

    Valerie Cooley, a stay-at-home mother on the Upper East Side of Manhattan who has three children, ages 11, 9 and 4, has spent the last three Mother's Day weekends at a hotel alone. "The rule ...